What? No! What the fuck did I just watch… I feel like I have just watched a straight to DVD movie with a guy just coming off of infomercial acting. The Happening stars Mark Wahlberg and Zoey Deschanel, directed by M Night Shymalan, in a movie that somehow did not kill their careers. In The Happening (really? That’s the name you went with?), strange phenomenons are happening  all over the east coast parks people where are killing themselves. You follow Elliot and his terrible wife (I think) on their fun filled road trip avoiding the wind from trees that makes you kill yourself, only if you are a bad person though, because trees respect character! There is nothing linear about this story, nothing that was a good idea, and more laughable than scary. The acting was a complete shit SOMEHOW. These are top name, A-list actors, yet they just seem utterly bored with the millions of dollars they are getting paid to ACT. The ending seems to just come out of nowhere too, 10 minutes from the end I didn’t even realize I only had to endure only 10 more minutes of this spew. I don’t even realize how M Night to this day is still being given money for garbage like this. I’ll never see another one of his movies again.