Fifty Shades Darker movie review

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You want to know what makes me mad? This is actually a good story. If you lay down the bullet points for this movie, take out all the weird BDSM stuff, and don’t make it too over the top dramatic, it could be damn good. But, NOPE, they kept the weird (fake) BDSM stuff, roided the fuck out of the drama, slapped on some shitty writing and glazed over actors, and BAM! Released a shit storm of a movie that makes me angry to this day. You know I watched this months ago, forgot it even existed, and then saw it in my feed and was like, “Shit, I watched that didn’t I? I should probably review it.” This is the most forgettable piece of garbage film that ever came about. It makes twilight look like a god damn masterpiece in film making and love. I want them to cast Kristen Stewart in the next one to add a little emotion to this movie. I want Michael Bay to direct it, add in some some explosions to grab my attention and then M Night to come in a and throw me for a loop so I don’t want to claw my eyes out watching a couple more of these… Yes, I realize I haven’t told you anything about the actual movie… The main chick who’s name is dumb is getting followed by one of the rich guys old flings and realizes he has a type. Also at some point in this they get back together and have a normal relationship which the girl thinks he doesn’t want. There is some turmoil with a different fling of his who is trying to break them up, and also a helicopter crashes. Didn’t follow any of that? Who gives a shit, this movie is trash.

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