The Lovely Bones is, in my professional opinion, the most emotionally taxing movie I have ever seen. Lovely Bones follows a young girl that watches her family, and murderer from purgatory as they unravel her mystery and move on from the loss. I saw after watching this movie that it had received low reviews and I’m honestly not surprised because it is definitely not a movie for everyone. The acting is good from the leads, and a standout performance is given by Stanley Tucci who plays the killer. Tucci plays creepy in a way that gets under your skin and incites paranoia. He is nearly unrecognizable in this role. Susan Sarandon is also great as the grandmother. The only aspect of this movie I wasn’t necessarily a fan of was the depiction of purgatory, or “the-in-between” as they call it. It was undeniably gorgeous in every shot, but a lot of the scenes I found myself bored in and wanting to go back to the parts of the movie following the family. It’s not a big issue, just a small gripe… My wife put it perfectly when she described this movie as “not too much of anything.” You never feel too overwhelmed while watching Lovely Bones. Sure, there are moments I’m on the edge of my seat and holding my breath, times I am nearly brought to tears, and times I can barely look at the screen. All of that is balanced though. I was also intrigued, happy, and even laughing in moments. That right there is what makes you need to take a moment and collect yourself after it’s over though. You have just exited a roller coaster that you never even knew you got on. You don’t know what to think, or feel, or even if you like it. To me, that is the beauty of this movie.
I’m a sucker for biopics. You tell me something is based on a true story and I’ll watch the hell out of it. Patriots Day was quite a surreal experience for me, and probably many other as well though. I was born in 1996 and don’t remember the tragedy of 9/11. There are a lot of people my age that do, but I do not. When the Boston Marathon Bombing happened I was sixteen years old. I was attending college at the time and remember watching not only the bombing itself, but the manhunt that happened afterwords… Making a movie such as this one is a difficult balancing act. When making a movie about a national tragedy you have to be respectful and truthful to the experience and the people in it. But, you also have to make an interesting and entertaining film. Patriots Day decided to also take on another ordeal and follow multiple stories and characters. Patriots Day follows Sergeant Tommy Saunders, played by Mark Wahlberg as our main character. Tommy was on the scene of the Boston marathon and there every step of the way. But, we also follow three or four other officers that play major roles in the eventual capture/deaths of the bombers as well as the Tsarnaev brothers themselves. I have to give a lot of respect to Alex Wolff as the younger of the bombing brothers. He did absolutely wonderful in this role, playing a difficult character and one that he knows is despised by an entire country. So good job to him… This movie may not be for everyone. It is gruesome, real, and difficult to watch at times. In my opinion though, that is what makes it so great.
I don’t normally write anything with lists, I more like to leave it unspoken. However, I believe this requires at least a little explanation… The pictures above list the order in which I believe is best to worst in the Transformers series.
Very clearly the first movie is a big high point in the series. It was the first time that we had gotten Transformers on the big screen in live action. The plot was very simple as well as interesting, making a good “origin story” for why the transformers are on earth, as well as where they came from. Shia was actually quite good in this, his high point in the series, as well as Megan Fox’s.
Dark of The Moon, although a stupid title, outrageously long, and far fetched at many points is a LOT of fun. It is the last movie that Shia is in, welcoming along Rosie Huntington-Whiteley as his new love interest (who I wish would have stuck around). This is the movie that shit starts to get kicked up a notch. Like I said, it is a bit more far fetched than the rest up to this point but I don’t expect realism out of my Transformers movies.
The Last Knight is the most recent Transformers movie and the second one since Mark Wahlberg took over the series. Mark is a far more experienced and superior actor to Shia and can keep a bad movie going with his screen time. Which, he had a lot of with the stupid run time of this movie. It is LOADS better than his first Transformers movie (though I don’t blame him), yet it is still quite bad. The only reason it is number three on this list is it brought some originality to the series after far too long of the same bland thing.
Age of Extinction… I’ll be honest, this movie is downright terrible. The first 20 minutes or so that follow Wahlberg as a failed inventor scrounging scrap with TJ Miller was better than the rest of this film. The only reason it is not at the bottom is because of how bad Revenge of the Fallen actually is.
Revenge of the Fallen… A huge pile of shit movie that almost ruined the franchise and leaves me saying for every movie, “Well… at least its not worse than two!”. The script is terrible and downright laughable at times, the new transformers make absolutely no sense and break every rule of the transformers that we have come to know, the plot is stupid as hell, the characters seem to be completely different people, and they gave a giant robot some BALLS. Enough said.
This movie is tricky. It will make it seem like you had a good time the entire movie by making you laugh like crazy in the last two minutes. Daddy’s Home stars Will Ferrell and Mark Wahlberg on screen once again. There is no doubt that these two have excellent on-screen chemistry and play off each other very well. That is the only reason this didn’t COMPLETELY crash and burn. That, and whenever Thomas Church was on screen. Few of the jokes hit and I never had a gut wrenching laugh until the very end when a surprise cameo came on. THAT part was perfect… Despite only being an hour and a half long, it feels far too long and was surprised to learn how short it is. I’m not saying this is terrible, but it is by no means good, or good for a comedy. It is merely OK and only watchable for Will and Mark.
There are two things that I am not afraid to admit about the Transformers series. 1. I am a fanboy and when I was younger Transformers was my favorite movie for a very long time. 2. This movie is a giant steaming pile of fucking shit. Not just shit, FUCKING shit. I’m serious. I am very pissed because I loved 1, 2 was terrible, 3 was good again, but this… What the hell happened? The beginning was solid! Mark Wahlberg is always awesome. The girl was hot. TJ Miller was hilarious. The story seemed like a solid enough of a platform… but then it when on for what seemed like 6 hours. Introducing the stupidest robots in the whole world. A boyfriend that you want to punch in the throat. I could rant for days and days. Why was that robot fat? Why did he have a metal cigar? Why was Bumblebee basically a child? WHY WAS THIS MOVIE MADE? YOU RUINED THE DINOBOTS YOU BASTARDS!!!
I was a huge fan of Ted 1, it was hilarious, original, and I will watch anything with Mark Wahlberg in it! When I heard Ted 2 was coming out, I was incredibly nervous that it would be a shitty cash grab. Which lets be honest it kind of is a cash grab, but it is far from shitty! Ted 2 stars Mark Wahlberg, Seth MacFarlane, and Amanda Seyfried. In this hilarious sequel Ted and his new wife Tami-Lynn want to adopt a baby. After submitting to try and adopt a baby it is found that Ted is property and not a person. Teds life is then swung into chaos and it is up to him, John, and their stoner-lawyer Samantha to save him. Now, though Ted 2 is hilarious as hell, it is completely non-linear. It’s story is good, much better than it had to be, but ninety percent of the movie is purely there so that a joke can be there. I don’t mind this, it reminds me of the way Family Guy is run, and I enjoy family guy! Amanda Seyfried is an awesome person to add into the mix! After seeing her, and her character, I wonder how I ever liked Mila Kunis in basically the same role, minus the weed. Ted 2 is good, if you don’t expect an amazing story you will be fine, because at least you will laugh your ass off.
Ted 2! I only have a single question… why? I bet I know the answer too… Money! All money hungry jokes aside, it doesn’t look like a half bad movie. I am concerned about the fact that Mila Kunis didn’t sign on, but that doesn’t mean its shit, she could have been busy. Or it’s shit. I was a huge fan of Ted, it had some of the funniest dialogue I have ever heard (“He’s a bear.”), and I love the 2 stars. The fact that Mila isn’t in it is a bummer, but these two can carry it no problem. Ted 2 follows Ted and John on their quest to get Ted to be seen as a person, and not property so he and Tami-Lynn can adopt a baby, not a bad concept. My worry is that we are going to see another Anchorman 2 fiasco, where it is the same movie, just less funny. The trailer is not bad, but if I am honest, I didn’t laugh. Sure I chuckled, but no laugh. I like these guys, but I don’t want to see a shitty cash-grab comedy.
The Gambler stars Mark Wahlberg as a college professor that has worked himself into tremendous debt and owes a lot of people a lot of money. The only way to pay them off is, you guessed it, gamble more! I am a big Mark Wahlberg fan, so despite this not being the best movie ever I still had a good time. But, I try to remain unbiased. Gambling movies are difficult, it’s not always exciting just to watch someone sit at a table and play a game of chance. Generally movies like this involve some sort of hustle. This one doesn’t, it’s JUST gambling. Luckily though, the single layered, boring plot is saved by the stellar performances by the cast. John Goodman, who has been killing all his rolls lately, is absolutely amazing in this! I love seeing John Goodman as a bad-ass man of power, he nails it. Wahlberg plays the Wahlberg character of a cocky guy who doesn’t really care. There are a few moments I zoned out, I will be honest, but all in all it’s a watchable movie. A good movie if you are really into this genre.